WCW World Championship Wrestling (4.13.91) 

 

April 13, 1991 

 

Taped: April 1, 1991 

 

We’re at Center Stage in Atlanta and some kind soul has put a load of WCW television on YouTube. So, you’d better believe I’m all over it. This is my happy place in wrestling. Early 90s WCW when anything could happen. I legitimately loved watching WCW when I was in my teens. I really didn’t get into the WWF until 1995, and that was because Hogan went to WCW and ruined it for me. Unlike most fans I know, my first American wrestling love was always WCW. I watched the odd WWF show at my neighbour’s house, and I clearly remember seeing the likes of Savage and Hogan years before I got hooked on WCW but for me, WCW was it. My first wrestling love. Jim Ross, Paul E Dangerously and Missy Hyatt host.  

 

Steiner Brothers vs. Don Allen & Lou Fabiano  

One of the best squash match teams of all time, is the Steiners. Are they jerks? Yes. Do I love watching ham and eggers get obliterated? Also, yes. Fabiano sensibly decides to just lie on the floor until he’s picked up and let the Steiners throw him around. He’s a big boy too. Frankensteiner puts Allen away. Everyone had a nice time here. Apart from Lou Fabiano’s spine.  

 

One Man Gang vs. Rick Hardrock  

RICK HARDROCK. Hard. Rock. Gang finished up as Akeem, the African Dream, and jumped to WCW. He’ll be fumbling and bumbling around here for most of 1991. This is significantly less fun than the previous match. Gang is managed by Kevin Sullivan, and he’d end up in the 1995-96 Dungeon of Doom. 747 Splash finishes in short order. Still way too long. Rick didn’t even have time to get his rock hard. 

 

Big Van Vader vs. Mark Kyle 

Vader did some TV stuff around spring 1991 before finishing up in New Japan and coming back to WCW in October. They clearly want to push him but can’t…yet. Paul E points out that he stinks because he doesn’t wash and he doesn’t care. The amount of people who say Vader smelled bad suggests that Vader smelled bad. Kyle is 6’2”, 300lbs and Vader just treats him like a child. This is the kind of squash that would have popped a young Bernard Rage. It’s even more fun than the Steiners squash. Every clothesline looks like it should be the finish. Powerslam ends it. MARVELLOUS.  

Post Match: Missy Hyatt gets Vader for an interview. Vader basically ignores her and yells about Stan Hansen. “NOW HANSEN NOW. I FEAR NO MAN AND I FEEL NO PAAAAAAIN”. “And could you tell us about your favourite breakfast spot” – Missy. “AAAAARRRGH” – Vader 

 

Beautiful Bobby vs. Pat Rose 

Bobby Eaton, despite being cheered, jumps Rose from behind as Paul E praises him for not losing his edge. Despite Eaton’s initial cheating, he then controls the whole match with a bunch of scientific holds. It’s pretty dull. I’m not sure why Eaton has to drag this out. The crowd is visibly disinterested. Pat Rose gets way more than any other jobber tonight. Alabama Jam still finishes with minimal effort from Beautiful Bobby. An oddly put together match where the jobber got far too much. 

 

Video Control gives us some promos, and I’m reminded that Gordon Solie still works here. He’s about 60 at this point. It’s a real shame Solie isn’t on more tape because there’s no doubting his position as one of the finest commentators of all time. I think if you asked Jim Ross, arguably the best commentator of all time, who he thought was the best, he’d probably go for Solie.  

 

Fabulous Freebirds vs. Dave Johnson & Terry Bronson 

DDP is such a try hard this early in his career. His promos are all “GOOOD GAWWWWDDD” and “colder than the other side of the pillow”. The Diamond Doll gimmick worked very well for him though. Johnson will work in All Japan after this as “Blackheart Devastation”. Mr & Mrs Devastation just went ahead and called their boy Blackheart. The Freebirds aren’t used to being on top in matches, so Hayes does Bronson a few favours until Bronson whiffs on a kick and BOY, is PS unhappy about it. Potato Central. Johnson tags in, and Garvin drills him with a DDT before he can do anything. Hayes continues to beat the piss out of Bronson. My favourite kind of jobber match is when a jobber fucks something up and the pro takes it out on him. The time honoured tradition of some poor kid getting his ass kicked. 

 

Terrance Taylor vs. Tim Parker  

Alexandra York gets a prophetic pre-match promo where she claims to be “watching” Dustin Rhodes. She’ll be watching him alright. They got married in 1993. The York Foundation has gained Mr Hughes as a bodyguard. Taylor is alright here. He looks clinical and Parker is a good foil. A plucky babyface with a good physique and athleticism. They don’t do great with the finish, Taylor’s patented “Fivearm”, (get it, because it’s better than a forearm) with Taylor barely connecting. It looked more like a twoarm. Otherwise, this was decent. 

 

Dustin Rhodes vs. Larry Zbyszko 

Big Dust Jr is getting a run of matches against guys who can make him improve. So far, Dustin has been a big fat dud. He’s not good here but at least Larry can cover for his shortcomings. With Dustin, the basics worry me the most. He can’t do an armdrag, he can’t take an armdrag. Larry knows what his role is. He stalls, slows it down, calms Dustin, and doesn’t push him into sequences. My favourite thing about Larry is that he doesn’t fuck stuff up. Something that 90s wrestlers would struggle with. He also hits a very nice lariat, and Dustin is at his best taking bumps.  

 

Larry is 40 here and already thinking about retirement. His full-time career came to an end in 1992. Larry probably slows this down too much, putting Dustin in an array of holds during a sub ten minuter. Dustin’s biggest issue remains hitting decent offence. He doesn’t use his size well. Terry Taylor trips Dustin up here, but he still manages to roll Zbyszko up. Taylor, the big fuckwit, is still holding Dustin’s leg, giving him extra leverage. This is the best Dustin Rhodes match I’ve seen so far. ** 

 

Post Match: Dustin gets beaten up, so Ricky Morton runs in for the save and ends up playing Ricky Morton in his OWN SAVE, and Dustin must save him. Mr Hughes steps in there and oh no, don’t let him wrestle Dustin. For the love of Pete. 

 

Video Control gives us clips of the Lex Luger and Nikita Koloff feud. There’s been a lot of pull apart brawls so far since Nikita blasted him with the US belt at Wrestlewar. We get the closing moments from a match between them at Meadowlands Arena. Koloff gets disqualifed for using the chain, so Lex batters him with it and then clocks the referee too. This just exists to sell house show tickets as they were running this around the horn. It won’t be on a PPV at all. 

 

The Danger Zone: Arn Anderson 

Paul E is here to interview Arn, and he wants to know what’s up with the Four Horsemen. Double A vaguely answers, but he seems proud he’s the TV champion all alone without the help of the faction. 

 

Barry Windham vs. Tommy Angel 

JR tries to sell us on the idea that Tommy Angel is “improving every week”. He’s a jobber mate. No one buys that.  

Well, maybe this fan! Windham absolutely creams Angel with a sneaky lariat on the floor and that could easily have been the finish. It looked brilliant. Windham looks classy throughout and finishes with the superplex. This was tight and tidy. It’s so weird how Windham would get another couple of years at this level and then just fall apart.  

 

Ric Flair vs. Brian Pillman 

This is not for Flair’s world title. The WCW one. He’s lost the NWA one in Japan to Tatsumi Fujinami. That hasn’t aired in the US yet so…he’s called “undisputed” world champion here. They had a match about a year before this, which was ***½. There was a feeling Flair really wanted to work with Pillman and get him to the next level. They absolutely tattoo each other with chops in this. Flair is all over the place here. When he has someone who can keep up with his schtick it’s really fun.  

 

Flair does a lot of cheating but also bullies the smaller Pillman and gets into it with the crowd. He stops off to threaten to fuck someone’s mother at one point. Pillman is all about selling and also firing up. It’s important you know he’s hurt, so his comebacks seem more valiant. Flair is somewhat cartoonish here with the delayed face bumps, but he also comes across as insane and ruthless, which makes him feel more dangerous. They run a ref bump, followed by a Double A run in, Flair trying to break Pillman’s leg and eventually El Gigante turns up for the DQ. Damn, this was a RIOT. I had a blast with this. ***¾ 

 

Sting vs. Tony Mella 

Mella is a pudgy fatass. Stinger Splash. Scorpion Deathlock. That’ll do.  

 

Sting yells at Flair about title shots as we close the show.  

 

The 411: 

Worth seeing for the Flair-Pillman clash but also the show had some very fun squashes. Steiners, Vader and Michael PS Hayes getting testy after a jobber miscue. I always loved watching these shows because they gave you little recaps of what was happening and throw you the odd bone with a good match. Squash matches should come back, honestly. Way too much wrestling on TV nowadays is undercard people exchanging wins and nobody cares.