TWA Winter Challenge II (3.2.91) review 

 

March 2, 1991  

 

We’re in Philly at Penn Hall. We’ve dipped our toes in TWA three times before, back in 1990, and we know what to expect here. It’s going to be shit, but the atmosphere and bloodshed and bloodthirsty fans is a great contrast to WWF. WCW is heading that way too. PG boredom. No wonder ECW drew such a big fanbase. Tonight is very inspired by old NWA. Jerry Lawler, Terry Funk, Abdullah the Butcher, Cactus Jack, Eddie Gilbert, Ivan Koloff, Manny Fernandez, Stan Lane and Jim Cornette all feature.  

 

You know who else does? SABU. It’s his debut for TWA. The Sheik is on the card too, so that’s probably how he ended up getting booked. It’s the start of a lengthy love story between Sabu and the Tri-State Area. This show also has the continuation of the Cactus Jack-Eddie Gilbert rivalry. They wrestled on the Autumn show and, quite frankly, didn’t have a very good match.  

 

Oh god, this show is three hours long. It’s on YouTube if you want to experience it yourself.  

 

A note on the title “Winter Challenge 2”. It’s March. It’s the first week in March so maybe we can give them a pass on having such a bad title. We’re welcomed to the show by Joel Goodhart; TWA’s owner, booker, promoter and onscreen authority figure. Having just liberated Kuwait, the USA is all full of itself and that little girl comes out to sing the anthem again. The crowd loudly chant “USA”. Philly heels on everyone…bar the military and children. The building looks totally different. They’ve lit it like the dingy shithole it is. The crowd disappearing off into the shadows. It feels, spiritually, like the ECW Arena crossed with WWF shows before Vince McMahon Jr took over. Grimy, horrible. Real.  

 

Stan Lane vs. Al Perez 

The Midnight’s theme gets a big pop, and Lane is cornered by Jim Cornette. MXP hadn’t long quit WCW and were seen as heroes for doing so. Perez’s theme is muted, presumably for copyright reasons. Cornette makes some racial and homophobic remarks about Perez before we get underway. I know….I am shocked, gentle reader. It is Philly though. We’ll hear far worse. The gimmick is that Lane complains about having his hair pulled and his tights pulled and then does those things. They do a ‘heel keeps running the ropes’ bit and Cornette spices it up by jumping in and taking the bump. 

 

It’s the kind of rinky-dink shit they would run in small towns full of peasants. Cornette showing us exactly what he thinks of Philadelphia and the TWA. They do some nice heel work with Cornette concealing his interference. Lane is sloppy as hell, but they sometimes do ok work here. I thought Lane was going to do a springboard, but he just vaulted into the ring and then botched the spot anyway. They make another mess of the Cornette racket throw and Perez wins with a sunset flip. This was fine for the most part, and Cornette was the best worker out here. Stan Lane looking sadly washed, just months after departing WCW. **¼ 

 

Ringmaster Rumble 

A bunch of guys in here, mostly local talent.  This is ROYAL RUMBLE STYLE. The winner gets a title shot later tonight. Glen Osbourne and Johnny O start and the latter has an eye patch. Osbourne is trying to look like the Rockers and failing. The crowd are already bored with the two minute time interval for the new wrestler coming out. Nobody wants two minutes of Johnny O, brother. They want zero minutes of Johnny O. He wrestles like one of the Tough Enough kids. 

 

Jimmy Jannetty joins the fray. Guess who his favourite wrestler is? If you squint, and VQ is middling so we’re already squinting a bit, he looks like Marty. We speed up the entrances and next in is HOSS. He’s a huge 6’4” monster heel and he’s over. He’d never amount to anything, but he did once beat Nigel McGuinness in Heartland. We start scraping the barrel as Rockin’ Rebel is in next. I’ve made my feelings about Rebel very clear. Given the reaction to Hoss, I’m surprised he doesn’t clear more of these jabronies out of here.  

 

Next in is CRYBABY WALDO!!! A huge fat guy in pink gear. The crowd is, naturally, excited about two big dudes fighting. CN Redd, the Mean Mark knockoff, is next. Hoss tumbles out and the crowd are not happy about it. We’ve totally abandoned the timescale of the match now with people coming in one after another. Ghetto Blaster is next. He’s a Bad News Brown clone. All these Philly scrubs just copied someone else’s look and hoped for the best. Sandman comes in and makes a point of decking the already eliminated Jannetty. He’s now got green trunks and is mimicking Sting.  

 

Larry Winters arrives and the ring is starting to fill up. They do hit the odd spot out there, but it’s ugly wrestling. Next in, to no reaction, is SABU. He dives into the ring between the second and bottom rope. Holy shit. He goes right after Sandman. He knew. The trouble with this Sabu is he feels like an Islander so he doesn’t stand out. Bulldog Brower Jr enters. I have no idea who he is, but he is handily the worst wrestler in the match. And ROCKIN’ REBEL is in this. JT Smith eventually arrives and we must be near the end now.  

 

Nope, there’s more. Wild Child enters. Another guy who really likes the Rockers. He’s thrown straight out and replaced by Rick Perez, who looks like Al Perez shrunk in the wash. John Rock is here! He would go on to feature on early ECW shows. You probably don’t remember him as he’s so nondescript. Michael Bruno, yet another local guy, enters. He’s losing his hair and can’t accept it. I have yet to see a spot that didn’t look like total shit. Don E Allen enters and that’s the last guy. I have a quick head count and we’ve got Smith, Sandman, CN Redd, Bruno, Allen and Rockin’ Rebel. CN Redd takes an incredible bump to eliminate himself. It’s the Sgt Slaughter one. It’s the best spot of the match. Fair fucking play Redd.  

 

FINAL FOUR: JT Smith, Sandman, Don E Allen and Rockin’ Rebel. Only the latter is so bad I wouldn’t want to watch a singles match from them. Rebel dumps Allen and Don E hits him with a chair to knock him out too. Thank you, Don E. Allen. Sandman’s work here, if I’m being polite, shows his lack of experience. No wait, he’s “unconventional”. That’s better. He’s about a year into his career and wrestles like he’s not been taught anything and is just winging it. They both go for pins, in an over the top rope match, and eventually JT clotheslines Sandman out to win the title shot. This was needlessly overstuffed and nearly 30 minutes long. DUD 

 

Russian Chain Match 

Ivan Koloff vs. Nikita Koloff 

This is the billed match and Nikita was booked as a babyface but he just turned heel on Lex Luger so he gets…a mixed reaction. He refuses to wrestle Ivan. I guess WCW told him he could appear but not work. To be fair to Nikita, he draws some great heat here and I’m sure a lot of these fans probably saw him wrestle Luger on a WCW house show. They announce Ivan as the winner but, in VERY ECW FASHION, Manny Fernandez comes out to be the actual opponent.  

 

Russian Chain Match 

Ivan Koloff vs. Manny Fernandez  

Manny is almost finished with only a run in Global before disappearing into the dirt tier Indies. Ivan, despite his obvious aging issues, still has a few years left working around Philly. Both guys are obviously past their sell by date here and the crowd only put up with the terrible wrestling because of their history of bleeding profusely. They don’t do that here though. It’s just a dull, plodding brawl. Nikita comes back, interferes on Ivan’s behalf, and Team Koloff picks up the win. -* 

 

Interesting to note that Nikita Koloff got the biggest pop in this BY A MILE for hitting the Russian Sickle on Manny.  

 

Falls Count Anywhere 

Eddie Gilbert vs. Cactus Jack  

Cactus comes out to “Born to be Wild”, which isn’t muted but whatever Gilbert uses is muted. Cactus has a better handle on what bloodthirsty scum they are in Philly and almost immediately takes it outside. The bump he takes, legs first, over the rail is brutal. Nobody was bumping like Mick was. Nobody was that dumb! The match has a lot of walk and brawl, which TWA has done before, but that was before they had mood lighting. So, now you can’t see anything. 

 

It’s nice to see a falls count anywhere that actually has a lot of pin attempts outside the ring. Eddie uses a fan’s crutch and the reactions they’re getting is incredible. This is the start of the hardcore revolution in front of our very eyes. That was the 90s. The 90s were HARDCORE, BABY. We even have a TABLE SPOT. The only thing that breaks is the leg as Cactus takes a backdrop on it, but Gilbert isn’t satisfied and throws the table in the ring! Cactus fails to break the table a second time, being thrown face first into it. Oh man, they didn’t gimmick that son of a bitch at all, did they?  

 

Cactus hits his demented elbow drop, which actually makes sense here as he can pin Gilbert on the floor. Not content with that, Cactus hits a sunset flip off the apron. This might be the kind of thing you’re used to seeing nowadays, with padded mats at ringside…. but in 1991…that’s batshit crazy. Eddie’s valet tries to throw something to him, and Cactus plucks it out of the air and wins with the foreign object shot. Should have finished with the sunset flip imo. ***¼. Crazy bumps. Way ahead of the curve. The crowd are left stunned at some of this. Way better than their first match too.  

 

Sheik vs. Abdullah the Butcher 

A rare sighting of the Original Sheik. He debuted in the 40s and is a legendary figure in bloodshed. Abby has his fans too. They both jab each other in the head with sharp things. That’s the match. Bulldog Brower (Sr) helps out by continually punching Abby. Sheik is 65. Brower, who looks ancient, is merely in his 50s. Everyone bleeds. The crowd seem into it but they would be. They’re less thrilled with the conclusion; a double DQ before local scrubs come out to fight them and the veterans clean house. Barely a match. DUD 

 

The brawl continues for AGES. I literally leave the room for a bathroom break and when I come back, it’s still going. Abby ends up going back to the ring and then roughing up Joel Goodhart. What a fucking mark.  

 

Barbed Wire Match 

Johnny Hotbody vs. Tony Stetson 

Both of these guys used to be WWF jobbers. They look like it. The barbed wire is hanging off the ropes and isn’t even visible from the hardcam. They can do a few basics here but anything advanced and FUHGEDDABOWTIT. Stetson’s attempted dropkick is a prime example. Hotbody is the better worker. He’s sharper and more intense. I find his work more believable. This would probably have benefited from not following another match that grinds away slowly with bloodshed as the central plot. It doesn’t help that the VQ is bad so you can’t see the barbed wire spots anyway.  

 

This is slightly better than the chain match and the old guys in the last match. They at least put some effort into it. It’s very long though, with a lot of samey ‘pushing head into barbed wire’ spots and ends with a roll up. Haha. Roll ups are hardcore, baby. *¼  

 

Considering how awful Hotbody usually is, I thought he put in a decent shift here. Scarily; there is an hour left on the show with TWO matches remaining.  

 

TWA Championship 

DC Drake (c) vs. JT Smith 

DC Drake is the defining TWA wrestler. He had a lot of pre-ECW style matches and was their long-running heel champion. And when TWA became ECW? He simply disappeared. Like Shane Douglas, he always seems to have overlong matches. He’s also largely overshadowed by his female manager (Woman). DC threatens to brain a fan with a chair after they grab his towel, and nobody moves at all. Nobody gives a fuck in Philadelphia, mate. DC spends a solid 4-5 minutes arguing with fans before the match starts.  

 

Which I would complain about but at least we didn’t have to watch them wrestle for that 4-5 minutes. As I see Woman strolling around at ringside, I can’t help but think….how on earth has she lowered herself to this shit? And why did no one offer her a job? JT, meanwhile, is producing a horrendous display of bumping. DC’s moves aren’t very good but JT’s bumps are horrible. DC goes to choke JT on the ropes and he falls through them. I quite liked JT Smith the last time I saw him. Here? Less so.  

 

DC ends up working the arm, which he switches between because he forgets which arm he started with. Christ, this is boring. JT, famously known for running out of steam, is gassed and can’t do anything after ten minutes. DC’s fix for this is to throw the son of a bitch out of the ring in a horrendous looking bump. I mean that in a complimentary way. He totally ate shit on it. JT does have one move left in the tank; hitting a clothesline from the TOP ROPE to the floor.  

 

Ref gets distracted and then bumped. Larry Winters then appears, in a referee shirt and counts DC down. The bell rings. The crowd cheer the title change. And then Winters clotheslines JT and beats him up. Uh…why not just attack him? Why even bother with the referee shirt? To give JT Smith the horrible feeling of victory and then strip it away from him? I don’t know. Anyway, the match was awful. Barely saved by two ridiculous high spots (the bump to the floor/clothesline off the top). Everything else sucked. * 

 

Post Match: referee John Molineaux takes the second best bump of the match. Sending it over the rail off a DC Drake right hand. Some of the same jabronies from earlier come out here and we get a repeat of the earlier brawl. Less people care this time. DC Drake continues to argue with fans for another five minutes. What kind of crazy person sees DC Drake and JT Smith and says “oh hey, fellas, have 30 minutes of my show’s time and just do whatever you want”.  

 

Audience Lumberjack Match 

USWA Unified World Championship 

Terry Funk (c) vs. Jerry Lawler  

You are reading that match description correctly. This has CAR CRASH written all over it. A child tries to sass Terry Funk and immediately hides behind his dad when Terry steps closer. He would have slapped that child’s face off. Believe it. Lawler is already a seven-time former champion. Vladimir is ringside! He informs Terry Funk that he’s “number one”. Excellent tastes that Vladimir. Babyface Lawler is informed he “sucks” by Philly.  

 

Terry’s first trip to the floor sees the fans get a bit handsy and Funk isn’t best pleased. Punch someone Terry! They started it! Funk tries to set up a spot where he stomps Lawler on the apron but the fans roll him back in. Haha. Hat Guy calls Funk a “Texas hick” loudly and Funk wades through the lumberjacks to get at him. The best thing about this match is the punches. Two guys who could throw a great looking punch, wailing on each other.  

 

One of the fans is chastised by a man in a suit after he shoves Lawler back in despite him not even being out of the ring. The lumberjacks then struggle to get Lawler back into the ring and I think the boys decide to fuck with the marks a bit by having a brawl on the floor. Funk spills to the floor to blade and again the guy in the suit has to back up the rubes so he can do it. One of which has his foot. Come on, guys.  

 

Funk has had enough of the one lumberjack and goes right after him with a wild look in his eyes. The lumberjack sensibly backs up. I would too, man, Terry was legit. Funk goes after Lawler with a belt and beats up the ref and the match is thrown out. What a hilariously shit ending to a dreadful mess of a match. DUD 

 

Whoever had this idea…what did you think would happen? An absolute clusterfuck. Given Lawler’s propensity for winning this title, I’m shocked he didn’t pick up reign number eight here but hey, him losing was probably bigger news. He’d have it back soon anyway. The lumberjacks are still milling around so Terry chases them all off and throws a chair at the retreating mass of humanity.  

 

One of the most alarming moments in the post match is Lawler making “fat lip” gestures at a black man, suggesting he should shine his shoes and referring to him as “sambo”. Hooo boy.  

 

The 411: 

The Philly approach to wrestling was blazing along here. Imagine some crazy shit, because that’s what’s going to happen. The fans are part and parcel of the experience. Jerry is lucky he didn’t ask for a chair from the crowd here because, based on future experiences, he would have received several. Worth seeing for the sheer pre-ECW vibes of Philadelphia. It was a city ripe for excitement and bloodshed. It felt like you could start a fire here and, with ECW, they sure fucking did. Also, great little Cactus-Gilbert match up. We are witnessing the building blocks of ECW here. The prototype for what followed. I found it amusing how many non-finishes happened here though. Three of the last four matches were thrown out. Hardcore!