Adventures in Football #109: Fohlenplatz (Borussia Monchengladbach) 

 

NOVEMBER 15, 2024  

 

BORUSSIA MONCHENGLADBACH vs. PREUßEN MÜNSTER (Test Match) 

 

I apologise for the lack of consistent accents over letters during this write up but they’re a pain in the ass to do. The O of “Monchengladbach” should have one and “Munster” will be devoid of its umlaut after this one. So, hey, I went to Germany again! The story is that my close personal friend “The Big Dohmi” lives in Dusseldorf and we did a trip to Luxembourg last year, which fucking ruled. It was a fantastic weekend and in 2024 I wanted to replicate it. Sadly, we struggled to get the week lined up and before we knew it, we were into the winter and neither of us could get sufficient time off to go somewhere exciting. Wanting to ensure we still got something in this year, ahead of hopefully something exciting next year, I’ve popped over to see him and we’ve done some local football. Well, local if you’re from the Ruhrpott.  

 

I started my adventure by heading to Birmingham International Airport, an airport that comes in for a lot of stick for being shit but you know what? It really is. It’s absolute shit. You pick the wrong date to fly out of Birmingham and your life will be hell. HELL. Anyway, I got through security pretty swiftly on Thursday evening and settled into the airport Spoons for a few bevvies. Why is it so expensive at the airport? Tim Martin is a cunt.  

 

On my way into Birmingham, I almost do a travel faux pas. I’m googling roaming charges, because I can’t remember what they are, and I suddenly become aware that I’m in the airport train station. That was a close call, ladies and gents! The only issue with security on the way out was discovering I had odd socks on. I would have taken a photo, but my phone was passing through the big x-ray gimmick at the time.  

 

7.55pm is take off and the boarding is a free-for-all. Eurowings just don’t give a fuck. They call business class passengers and only one dude stands up, so everyone piles down the gangway. I’m sat next to a guy who tries to have a chat with me in German. I didn’t even realise he was talking to me. Anyway, we take off and he fucks off somewhere else while I’m resting my eyes. Disappearing on a plane is quite the magic trick. 

8.45pm and I open Maps and discover it can still tell where I am. I try to take a screenshot as I’m passing over Eindhoven as my friend Joao lives there.  

And just like that, baddabing, baddaboom, we’re auf Deutschland. Dohmi is meeting me at the Rewe in case my phone doesn’t work in Germany. EE seem to change the rules about what’s allowed, vis-à-vis roaming, in the EU every trip. They text me and a tenner later, I have a week’s worth of sweet, sweet EU data. Everyone rushes to deplane, like they did to get on the flight, and they have to sit and wait on a bus like the losers they are. Haha.  

 

After meeting up with Dohmi we head back to his flat for some of his mother’s delicious chili and a few Schumacher Alts. I can’t go to Dusseldorf and have no bloody Altbier. It would be a crime.  

 

Friday morning and we’re heading to Monchengladbach for Gladbach’s remaining players to face 2. Liga’s Munster in a “test match”, which is German for “friendly but with some tasty tackles occasionally”.  

In the background there is Borussia Park, Gladbach’s actual stadium, which holds 54,000. We’re not in there today as there’s only a few thousand fans at these games. Like Man City, Gladbach built an entire complex when they built this stadium back in 2005. Which includes state-of-the-art training facilities and whatnot.  

Thankfully cool graffiti remains. One of the great things about German football is the sheer amount of cool graffiti you get near a ground. You know you’re coming up on it, because BAM, Nord Kurve. It’s a huge complex and we walk halfway around it, admiring Borussia Park and the fan shop as we go.  

The stadium is an absolute whopper. It’s a shame they didn’t play the game in there. It could have been cool to roam around inside.  

Instead we are here. This is the “Fohlenplatz”. Fohlen after the nickname of Gladbach; “die Fohlen” or “The Foals” if you’re struggling with that one. It’s a tidy little facility with a small seated area down the one side. We stood just past it and the views were good.  

On the opposite side, and blocking the potential view of Borussia Park, is this custom-built hotel. So, you can have the full Gladbach experience. I noticed people watching the game out of their hotel windows. The area that surrounds this pitch is made up of other training pitches. There were at least three more*.  

 

*I went on Google and there are ten more pitches all of differing sizes.  

 

It’s an impressive facility overall. They even had a burger van (well, it sold bratwurst and beer, but we are in Germany) and a portacabin to take a piss in. The crowd was decent for this considering it was a 1pm kick off on a Friday. A lot of German businesses run half days on Fridays. While I’m making notes about it Munster score on the break. I did see the ball go into the net, but I was damn close to missing the first goal of the weekend. 0-1.  

Gladbach are the better team, but they don’t play brilliantly. They level up at 1-1 with a header from a cross on the left. It’s a decent goal but not a patch on the goal that puts them in front at half time. Robin Hack collects the ball and sees the keeper off his line. He lobs him from near the halfway line. Big cheers for that one! 2-1 Gladbach.  

 

The second half is a bit of a mess. There are lots of subs and Gladbach are absolutely shite. Considering they’re a Bundesliga outfit. Munster only have themselves to blame for shipping a third, allowing a shot from the edge of the box, which is saved, but Yannick Michaelis follows in. 3-1. Game over.  

I go and take a selfie outside the ground just to prove I was actually there. Just out of picture is a bloke taking a piss up the fence. Ultras! Dohmi takes us over to Rewe and we stock up including slugging back a couple of Uludags. It’s the Turkish version of Vimto! Dohmi starts regaling me with the history of Nascar after I told him I knew nothing about it the day before. There’s another game coming up, so let’s get the scores on the doors for Gladbach and move on! 

 

FINAL SCORE: GLADBACH 3 MUNSTER 1  

 

ATMOSPHERE 

Friendlies don’t tend to get much in the way of atmosphere, and this was no different. The crowd were supportive and the lobbed second goal got a big cheer. However, overall, there wasn’t much to shout about so nobody did any shouting. *½ 

 

COST 

This was ten Euros to get into, which is reasonable. What else are you going to do for ten Euros on Friday lunchtime? **** 

 

QUALITY 

A bit hit and miss. The first half was a much better match all round. The second half drags us down to *** 

 

EASE OF ACCESS 

You probably need a car. It’s an hour’s walk from the centre of town so it’s not that far away. There is also a bus, which is every twenty minutes, but on a proper game day you’ve got no chance with 54k leaving at the same time. **½ 

 

MISC 

While it’s a cool set up there’s no escaping that this is a satellite of a bigger building. The proximity to it and the club shop means you can still get the Gladbach experience though. *** 

 

OVERALL: 14 

It was a good experience but it’s not a real stadium and that does hurt the score a bit. Put a competitive game on there and you might get a bit more joy on the score front. It was interesting to see another country do something different with their International break though.