Adventures in Football #115: Rodney Parade (Newport County) 

 

FEBRUARY 22, 2025 

 

NEWPORT COUNTY vs. CHELTENHAM TOWN (League 2) 

 

55/92 

 

This took place the day after Bristol City. It’s the first time I’ve split a room with Mike, despite our travels taking us all over the country (and indeed some other ones). I always worry that my snoring will keep people awake. The bonus of sharing a room is saving about £25 a head on accommodation. A coffee later and we headed out and over the Prince of Wales bridge over the River Severn and into Wales.   

As soon as we had crossed over Mike played some Tom Jones on his Spotify. Today we’re watching Newport County with our friend Wabz. Wabzy lives in Cardiff and is meeting us in Newport. You may remember Wabz from the Cardiff trip (Sep 8, 2021, Wales vs. Estonia). Now that I write it like that, probably not. It was Adventures in Football #24. 91 grounds later!  

 

On arriving in Newport, we park up at Friar’s Walk. It’s a shopping centre and our fellow motorists are being particularly unreasonable. The one cuts us up and there’s a great sense of satisfaction as we reverse into a parking space and she’s heading out of the exit, unable to park. Karma. We stroll over to Newport train station to pick up Wabz and intend to drop into the local Spoons for some cheap pints.  

 

However…we neglected to realise it’s Wales vs. Ireland in the Six Nations and the Spoons is packed full of Irish lads. Probably delaying their departure to Cardiff until the last minute. As luck would have it the pub I wanted to go to, the Pen and Wig, which is nearby, hasn’t suffered the invasion of rugby fans and we sit at the bar enjoying decent beers. The porter* they have on is smooth as silk and quite excellent.  

 

*Cwrw Otley 06 Porter. 

 

We move on after a few there as it’s starting to get rammed with football fans and people getting lunch. Wabz recommends Le Pub, and we head there for a few. Le Pub is a music venue with no sports crowd whatsoever, so it’s nice and empty on a Saturday afternoon.  

I check my camera reel and there’s loads of pictures in there, but nothing quite captures the atmosphere more than the “never shag a Tory” mirror. Would probably blame poor bedroom performance on fears of immigration.  

Anyway, here’s me and the boys. Beer enjoyers. Apart from Mike, he’s driving. The pre-match pints get a little out of hand and as a result, I have ZERO notes on my phone for the game. I normally make extensive notes because it’s so easy to forget what happened at a game. I can tell you we had some delicious beers though. For what that’s worth. Lovely to see Wabz too.  

The sun has come out in south Wales, and it makes the riverside area look a lot prettier. There seem to be less smackheads about too. When I first arrived in Newport, I was staggered at the number of smackheads strolling around the city centre. I know Wales has a big drug problem but there were literally five in the first five minutes on foot. That’s not normal.  

Anyway, welcome to Rodney Parade! On entering from the north, you pass Newport Athletics club, which is a huge open field off to the right here. It was quite jarring to have that much wide-open space right next to the ground. Bang in the middle of the town. The stadium is operated by Dragons RFC and is a multi-purpose football/rugby ground. Which means the one end looks weird with a big space behind the goal.  

 

I would ideally prefer all grounds to be football specific, but this part of the world has a strong love for egg chasing so we must put up with a weird shaped pitch. Newport has a chequered history. The 80s especially where they went from the dizzying heights of a narrow UEFA Cup Winner’s Cup quarter-final exit to Carl Zeiss Jena in 1981 to bankruptcy by 1989. They only returned to the football league in 2013. 

Anyway, into the ground and we’re in the terracing. Enjoying a spot of the old ‘standing’ at the football. Newport, bastards that they are, have left their away end entirely exposed to the elements. No cover whatsoever. It’s a tactic I’ve seen at a few clubs, and it seems needlessly mean. I know away ends are generally the worst part of the ground but come on. At least put a roof up. To be fair, that’s on the rugby club.  

This is the other end of the field, where the rugby elements come into play. The odd space behind the goal making no sense until you realise they play rugby here too. The far side looks like a fairly modern stand. The other thing that bugs me about a rugby ground is pitch markings. You always have pitch markings from the rugby, and it makes any team that plays in a rugby ground feel tinpot and small.  

I do love a terrace though. Look at this! Marvellous. Exactly how the beautiful game was intended to be consumed. On stone steps with a bunch of half cut blokes on a Saturday afternoon in the freezing cold. Ideal. 

The teams are out, and this is the last photo I took all day. I can only blame the pre-match beers for this. Both sides are mid-table in League 2 and the standard is noticeably worse than last night’s cracking game in Bristol. Newport don’t start too badly but give the ball away in the defensive third and are punished. A cross turned in, in unconventional fashion, by Matty Taylor. 30’. 0-1.  

 

Taylor was a bit of a prick and his behaviour on field was to wind up his opponents. As with last night, first blood to the bastard. Newport conceded a second in comical fashion. Their keeper got a rush of blood to the head and left his area to try and clear the ball. He sliced the clearance and the defender promptly lost possession giving Ethan Williams an open goal to chip the ball into. 53’. 0-2. Game effectively over as Newport hadn’t been able to create that many chances all game. 

Like, this is not a place you want your goalie to be in open play. Note the two covering defenders behind him. Sometimes you just stay on your line mate. I’d also be worried neither of the two players behind him thought to go back to the goal line and defend the shot. Either way, a calamity. Newport in the mud.  

 

Cheltenham made it 0-3 on 82’ with a set piece not being cleared and Ethon Archer fired a screamer into the bottom corner. The Cheltenham fans, exposed to the elements, were having a lovely afternoon. Around us? Less so. Half the terrace fucked off at this point. Subjected to being asked about fire drills. Sad. The referee, who was dreadful (and bald), compounded Newport misery by sending off Courtney Baker-Richardson for a second booking.  

 

FINAL SCORE: NEWPORT 0 CHELTENHAM 3  

 

With the sun going down over the River Usk, we headed back to Le Pub for a few more pints.  

It was this sort of day. A nice time with the lads, home team performance be damned. With Wabzy headed back to Cardiff, Mike drove us back to the Midlands where we indulged in a few more pints. Which is why I’m writing this on Monday. Sunday, I went with Mike to watching Bromsgrove Sporting’s ladies team draw 2-2 with Worcester Developmental. Amy Kendall scored an absolute screamer. I was not expecting the best goal of the weekend to arrive in such fashion, but such is football. 

 

ATMOSPHERE: 

It was pretty good, and it felt like it could easily have gotten better if the team had delivered. Sadly the mass exodus ten minutes from time chipped a little off proceedings. **½ 

 

COST:  

£21 to stand and watch a game in League 2. This is what inflation has done to the beautiful game. An outrage. Bonus half a star for still being cheaper than the rip off merchants at Colchester. *** 

 

QUALITY: 

It was a scrappy League 2 affair. The lack of quality in this league is palpable at times. Unlike with League 1, where you can get some really good games of football. League 2 is consistently poor. No wonder so many promoted non-league sides just breeze through this division. **½  

 

EASE OF ACCESS: 

Half a mile from the train station, bang in the middle of town. No complaints. **** 

 

MISC: 

The rugby ground stuff does bug me. However, a league game with a terrace and the option to get a decent seat as well is good. You can choose your footballing experience. I’ll give it *** 

 

OVERALL: 15 

Newport is a perfectly fine footballing experience for the lower divisions. The town itself is much nicer than I was expecting. Especially compared to a dump like Swansea.  

 

NEXT: I’m going to Malta!