Adventures in Football #121: The Old Spotted Dog (Clapton Community) 

 

MARCH 22, 2025 

 

CLAPTON COMMUNITY FC vs. CROYDON (Southern Counties East Division 1) 

 

OI, OI! Just back from a rowdy one in the Big Smoke. Lots of pints, lots of lads yelling stuff at the football and, because Clapton, a wild old day out for Non-League Day. Did I mention the pints? Anyway, I headed down to London on Friday night. My aim for the weekend was to surprise Lewis (who you may remember from Wimbledon AIF #22 or Charlton AIF #32). He’s leaving London at the end of the month and wanted to have a sent off match at Clapton before doing so. He invited all the lads down for it and I lied and said I was working. Anyhow, Friday I was allowed to leave work early to get down to London. 1pm, I was out of the office, back home, and by 6pm I found myself outside Marylebone train station. The world at my proverbial feet.  

 

My mate James has said I can stay at his gaff, and I’m meeting him at the Euston Tap. Also, Steve & Meg, who we’ll be joining for the Women’s Euros in bloody Switzerland in the summer. Switzerland! Imagine that? On arrival, I started into the pints and, let me tell you readers, this was quite a night for the pints. We had about four in the Euston Tap before Steve & Meg had to head off. Always a delight to see them both. Will be seeing a lot of them over the summer.  

 

Before we proceed; here is some London graffiti;  

 

After leaving Euston, James takes me to his local boozer; the Dog. It used to be the Dog & Truck (?) but is now just The Dog. Roughly 90 pints of Guinness later and I don’t remember going to bed.  

 

After a sluggish start to Saturday, and some coffee, we headed to Clapton (Forest Gate specifically) and took refuge in the Fox and Hounds. This boozer is one of the cheapest in London. You can get a pint of Guinness for less than £4. LESS THAN FOUR POUNDS. STERLING. I ordered two beers, and it came to under a tenner.  

“Hooligans”

Some of the lads were here and Liam introduced me to various other people, names escape me. Nice bunch of lads. They’re all coming to the game today. I’m struggling to finish a single beer, which should tell you how last night went. Lewis arrives and is surprised to see me there, which is marvellous. Hugs for him. We have a chat about his job and his wellbeing and why he’s had enough of London. It makes sense. He’ll be back in Wales in a few weeks. Hopefully we can get over and catch a game with him. 

 

As we’re conversing a geezer comes in with two massive Sainsbury’s carrier bags, full of books. He’s trying to sell them in the pub. What’s happening? He asks if we’re “hooligans” and I tell him Liam is, with his CCFC jacket on. One of the lads buys a book about the Krays from him. I’ve taken a picture of it at the ground, for posterity. We tell him he needs to learn five facts about the Krays before the day is out.  

 

The ground is a short walk from Forest Gate station and we tootle over there, getting to the ground around 1:30PM as the gates are opening. We decided to go early because it’s Non-League Day and capacity is 850. They regularly have 500 down here. It’s by far the best supported team in the league. Most of the other jabronies only get a hundred or so.  

The ground is a proper communal centre for the locals. The club is vehemently political in ways I’ve not really seen before. As an entity they are very far left wing. This is seen in evidence all over the ground and even outside where we have Walter Tull Way. Walter Tull is a little heard of footballer but is a great story. He was one of the first black players to play the game at the highest level in the UK (after Arthur Wharton and Willie Clarke). He was a player for Clapton before signing for Spurs and he had a lengthy career with Northampton Town before dying in the Somme in 1918.  

 

Some of the stickers, on the way in, are eye-opening. Clapton are punk. Anti-establishment. Anti-fascist. They’ve gone all in.  

 

We get to the gates and they’re open. The name of the club is emblazoned across the front but when they’re open the one side simply reads CLAP. Appropriately my save file for this image is CLAP10. Mike obliging with the clapping. Mike is on outstanding form. I can’t remember the last time he made me laugh as many times he does here. “That’s what football is all about” he says….“banter”.  

 

We pop into the clubhouse, and I acquire my second beer of the day. The clubhouse is a cool place with lots of scarfs from other teams and they’re shifting merch. Some of the lads get Clapton shirts at £36 a pop. They’re good quality.  

This is the local beer and what a can this is for a club at this level! The Scaffold is the stand where all the ultras stand. That’s where we’re watching the first half. It’s funny, I legitimately think I recognise a few of the local punters based on the can. While I’m stood outside the clubhouse, an older geezer walks past and chats to us about stuff and says he supports Wycombe, and we end up having a long old chatter about football. Sometimes, you just bump into a bloke and just start chatting about grounds and stuff. It’s lovely. I think he was a bit surprised when I told him I went to Adams Park in 1992. It’s what football is all about. That sense that we’re all mates because we’ve all done the same thing. The football. Age is irrelevant.  

There are stickers everywhere here. They sell stickers too. That lego-style CCFC one was in the shop. Several St Pauli stickers here and I saw several of their jackets. You can zoom in and notice references to educators against the far right, defend the right to strike and free Palestine. It’s that kind of place.  

Starting to feel the need for food so we stroll over to the food hut and get a kebab wrap. £8 with a great chili sauce on it. The wrap itself was almost a pancake in style and texture. Delicious stuff. Highly recommend it. Mike gets a £1.75 vegetable samosa and declares it to be “fuckin’ jumpin”. Fed and watered, we start to have a poke around the place. It’s a grass pitch, and it is NOT flat, but unfortunately, we’ve got goals on wheels. I don’t like goals on wheels. It’s a pet peeve.  

Oh, here’s the kebab wrap! I could go for another one of those right now. If it wasn’t for the salamella we had outside the San Siro, this would be the don of all football foods so far. Real good quality food and at this level of the game? Sensational lads. Interesting both of those foods were just meat and salad in a sandwich, of sorts. In the UK, I think we’ve gone too far in on the burger thing. We’re not good at burgers. Leave that to the Yanks. 

I fucking told you! Surviving the Krays by David Teale, purchased for £4 from some old scammer in the Fox and Hounds. Beautiful. It’s what football’s all about. Not long after we get there the ultras start rolling in and I know some people take exception to my use of “ultras”, but I think it’s pretty spot on here. It’s their club.  

A rogue ball ends up over by us and Mike scores! Lovely finish. It’s what football’s all about. You can just about see the uneven pitch in front of the keeper. Also a mole hill of epic proportions behind the goals. It’s a popular spot for people to stand and also where the queue starts for the outdoor bar and the toilets. The area around the beer tent is really busy. The thing is…everywhere is really busy. For the level this place is packed and rocking.  

Across the other side is where all the families and kids go. Also, behind the goal at that end, are the other Clapton Ultras. I think they’re Italian? They also spend the entire game chanting. The end is a bit barren compared to the rest of the ground, but I’ll show you as much as I can.  

This is where the Ultras will be. We’re encouraged to go into the scaffold itself and join in the chanting. We’re handed fliers detailing what it means to be in there. You have to chant, you’re not allowed to stand around talking to your mates and there’s no pictures. I’ve took this well early so the more radical members haven’t arrived yet, so I think this is ok. Just off shot is a huge FREE PALESTINE mural, which I thought I took a picture of but apparently I didn’t.  

These are the Italian lads. They also have a Palestine flag. Apparently there may be some beef between them and the main group of Ultras? I’m only going off something I overheard. Sadly, you can’t see the person watching this game from their window but I can assure you they were there. I wonder if he clocks in on Futbology?  

So, here’s where we are. In the fucking Scaffold. Bang on the halfway line. I can’t show you us in the Scaffold because of the no pictures ruling but that’s where we were. There’s a drummer right next to us and it takes about 15:00 before my head is killing me and I can’t wait to move somewhere else. Incredible atmosphere in there though. The trouble with Ultras is they tend to focus on making noise and less so on actually watching the game. I quite like to watch the game. They have three massive flags and one them regularly whacks me in the head. This would become a point of contention with the opposition gaffer! It was fun in here, no complaints. Glad I tried it out. More power to the scaffold boys for making it a cracking atmosphere.  

 

Early doors the winger (#7, don’t know his name) starts a fast break and is also on hand to finish at the far post when his errant cross is crossed better from the other side. 1-0 Clapton. Glad I was in with the Ultras for the celebrations.

I think I’m also safe showing you what the Ultras look like from a distance. You can’t really make out any faces or anything*. That whopping great big flag was where I was standing until I couldn’t cope with the percussion anymore. It’s an outstanding level of support for the level this team plays at. It’s ridiculous. They must have had 750-800 people at this game. Aside from the drumming and the stench of weed, it was great being in there, just singing along to their tunes. A favourite moment is when they started singing about Maggie Thatcher being dead and the sun came out. God approves this message! 

 

*If anyone from Clapton wants me to remove any of these, let me know. No problem. I’m contactable on Instagram or Bluesky (or Twitter at a push).  

 

Look at how snazzy that shirt is? Cracking. Behind the goal there are the Croydon fans. They’ve not brought a lot of lads with them, but they are quite vocal. You can’t hear them over the home support, but they were making a noise. Just before half time Croydon equalise and I was watching where I was walking at the time and missed it. I looked up to see a player hoof the ball off the line. So in my notes it’s down as “controversial” but apparently it hit the underside of the top netting before that. So, not controversial at all.  

 

As the players make their way off at half time you can hear someone say, “oi Rick, no one’s opened the changing rooms”. A bunch of players left standing around between two fences. We move around the ground, through throngs of unruly children, and settle in the far corner so we can check out the Italian Ultras. We can still hear the main lads but now we’re a bit more removed and can have a chat. I’m glad I experienced the scaffold, but I wouldn’t go in there as a regular thing.  

Half time break from Michael. The Italian lads set a flare off later. I only wish that was in the background for this picture. It would be a perfect mix of British calm and chaos.  

 

While we’re over in this corner I notice we’re remarkably close to people’s back gardens. The whole area becomes a children’s playground and I even spot a fox! While I’m admiring this urban nature a bloke walks up to us. I thought he was going to ask for a light or something. “Do you mind if I have a slash behind you?” Er. No. Go for it. While he’s tinkling away Mike tells Lewis that “these kids are gimps”. While we’re all chuckling away he adds “I am firmly against children”.  

Here’s the Italian Ultras with their whopping great spotted dog flag. An elite flag, I’m sure you’ll agree. As they start chanting for the second half we debate our favourite chant so far. “I love Jack in goal, stick another year on his contract baby” to the tune of “I Love Rock N’ Roll” is the winner.  

 

Full banter mode soon arrives as we find ourselves discussing the Croydon team having socks over socks. Who needs two pairs of socks. FACKIN TWO SOCKS? “Utter gimp behaviour” says Mike. After surveying the scene with two different sets of Ultras Mike has more to say; “you can tell they’re left wing because they’ve split into factions for no reason”.  

With the second half being devoid of entertainment we start making our own. Applauding certain players inability to complete passes. Watching this paint dry. How did this paint situation happen anyway? “Shall I paint this post?” “Yeah….no wait, no”. “But I’ve already done the top”. “Ahhh, just leave it, no one will notice”.  

This poor bugger gets a load of verbal abuse from the kids in our corner and he’s going along with it. Fair play. The ball has “Clapton Community FC” written on it!  

I’m going to assume it’s to stop all these feral kids from stealing it. The kids in the corner starting running onto the pitch during the game. Initially as a ‘dare’ and then just whenever they felt like it. The one lino had a hell of a time trying to keep the one kid from kicking his ball onto the pitch. That’s the level we’re at here, lads! The kids also challenge each other to throw crisp packets onto the pitch and the one lad just walks onto the pitch and drops one. In the picture of the player, you can see it!  

 

FINAL SCORE: CLAPTON 1 CROYDON 1 

 

I get the feeling someone was saving a flare for something exciting, and it didn’t happen, so they’re forced to just set it off after the game. The whole end consumed by blue smoke. It’s what football is all about.  

 

I have skimmed over the crowd trouble near the end. Croydon looked to get a late winner, only for it to be chalked off for a push on the keeper (which it was), and a fracas breaks out in front of the Scaffold. It turns out one of the flags kept hitting the Croydon boss and he’d just had enough of it and thrown a punch at the bloke waving it.  

 

Let’s give Clapton Community FC some scores, shall we? 

 

ATMOSPHERE: 

I would be happy to go five on this but there’s something about the whole “you must chant in the Scaffold” that feels a bit wrong. I chanted and then I moved when I didn’t want to do it anymore. I followed the rules but aren’t rules a bit against the club’s ethos? Anyway, that’s nit-picking. They were great. ****½ 

 

COST: 

It’s a fiver to get in. I know the level we’re at isn’t the best but that’s cheap. The only way it would score better is if it was free. ****½ 

 

QUALITY: 

This is the one thing we were missing. The game was crap. I do enjoy bad football though, so it wasn’t a total loss. Some of the players touches were delightfully shit. *½ 

 

EASE OF ACCESS: 

Just a short stroll from Forest Gate tube station. Google maps has it at 15 minutes. I think it’s not that long. 20 minutes from Upton Park if you’d prefer. *** 

 

MISC: 

There are a lot of things that make the Old Spotted Dog a special ground. The clubhouse, the beer tent, the merch, the fans and the food. It’s at the heart of the community and we had a chat with an old guy outside afterwards. He said he’d never been to a game but wanted to and could always hear them chanting. The area around the ground also feels like an extension of that. Bits of graffiti and stickers. You can tell you’re near a ground before you can even see it. I love that. **** 

 

OVERALL: 17.5 

A wonderful little day out. I’m glad Lewis got to have a nice send-off. The Old Spotted Dog should be on your lists if you’ve not been. Non-League Day was the perfect day to tick it off. It’s a club that’s passionate about doing the right thing and their fanbase is unbelievable considering what level the club play at. They’re building something special here. They just need it to translate into results on the pitch.  

 

The Old Spotted Dog is one of my favourite new grounds for this season. Up there with the Tony Bezzina stadium (which had Malta for a backdrop) and Bristol City. All good lads.